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Blogs > Nuke_N_Naughty > Adventures of Idahonuke |
Group Drama
Group Drama Okay, so here is what happened that lead up to us leaving the "Idaho Swingers R Us" group on Horny.net. I don't normally use names in my posts, but this time, I think it is appropriate. A couple weeks ago, Red made a post titled "Come On People" where she was trying to get people motivated and active because that is something that is very important to her as she has spent a LOT of time and effort to get that group where it is today. She shoudl be proud of that. At the time, I hadn't been posting a lot because I was working 12-hour night shifts (leaving the house at 5:00 pm and not getting back home until 8:00 am) on a 4-on, 4-off rotation. So I was pretty much only posting on my days off when I wasn't doing other things like taking care of the house and trying to have some fun. A few days after she made the post, it had gotten some attention from other people and then Nancy weighed in with her thoughts on it where she basically tried to explain that not everyone was as comfortable putting themselves out there like Red is and there were some new people in the group that might not be ready to jump into every conversation on there. Now, I didn't get a chance to read it myself because at the time I was sleeping (during the day) and after the initial explosion happened, Nancy deleted her comment because she didn't want it to cause any more issues or have things get out of hand. However, there was one couple in the group from another state (the female half of the couple is from Ammon) that took it as Nancy attacking Red. So instead of being an adult and addressing this issue directly with Nancy, she created another post and called Nancy out by name (profile name) and slammed her for criticizing Red and she also accused Nancy of deleting her comment to cover it up. Well, once I got up that day and got wind of what was going on, I sent them some messages (privately, not in the group) trying to defend Nancy and I said some things about Red that were rather insensitive and should not have been said because they were issues that should have been handled privately with Phil and Red. Well, when the female half of the couple from out of state read the unkind things I said about Red, she immediately picked up the phone and called Red to tell her what I had said. Naturally, Red was very offended by what I had said and she was very right to feel that way. So I sent them an email and apologized for the things I had said and explained the reasons behind them. Phil told me that she was going to leave the group. Naturally that made me feel pretty bad because she had put in a LOT of time and effort to make that group what it was, so I stewed over it for a day or two. Well, I saw that Red had left the group and I knew that she hadn't left Horny.net altogether, so I went to her profile and noticed that she was in another group that used to be run a couple that recently moved away from the area and had turned it over to another couple that used to be Associate Moderators of the "Idaho Swingers R Us" group. Well, Red was posting there just like she always had been doing in "Idaho Swingers R Us" and then I also noticed there were quite a few people there who left "Idaho Swingers R Us" shortly after week took it over. So that is when it him me, that "Idaho Swingers R Us" is her group, always was her group, and always will be her group and that we were never going to fit in or truly be accepted there. So I turned the group back over to her. Shortly thereafter, I saw that she created post with the title "100% Me or Us" and then I noticed that a lot of those people who had left after we took over started coming back. At that point, I knew I had done the right thing and I don't regret it at all. Now, after the fact, I have heard from several people, including Phil and Red, who read Nancy's post and NONE of them thought it was critical of Red at all. Dennis (Idahonuke) To read about myongoing adventures and journey into the lifestyle: [blog Idahonuke] |
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I am on here; and in the Groups I choose, for me. No one pressures me to do anything I don't want to do whether posting or playing in person. If I feel offended or don't like a comment; I do not respond immediately but take the time to think about the posting and the authors possible intent. I then decide whether to respond or not. I try not to make unkind remarks about anyone; be it in a forum or a private enail as it will invariably be broadcast to others. In this case; the horse has left the barn, so to speak. Apologies have been given so let's let it be put to rest. The ones involved are the only ones that really need to be deciding the outcome of this issue. We all should step back and let them make peace. T(bigdog)
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It is what it is and I was never comfortable with being expected to post frequently and fluffing others egos isn't my favorite thing to do especially when I am actually offended by those comments. Nastynancy22
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